Tatt's a little bit messy, Jesse - 30th August

August 30th: Jesse whined on: “Those girls I was photographed with meant nothing to me. I’d never betray Nadine. “I still love her and it is my dream that we get back together soon.” Don't hold your breath, mate.

August 13th: YOU heard it from me first – and here’s the proof that NADINE COYLE is back with Desperate Housewives hunk JESSE METCALFE.

UPDATE: September 3rd: "In another twist just three weeks ago, it looked like Nadine had forgiven him when she was snapped with her arms around him in an LA car park. But today Nadine reveals the truth behind the rumours. The singer insists Jesse NEVER cheated on her and reveals they are NOT an item again, despite those infamous pictures."

Do I even need to remind anyone which journalist took those "infamous pictures" as PROOF that Nadine and Jesse were back together? One of the pictures is reprinted today with the caption "Saying goodbye ... couple's embrace was not a sign they were getting back together."

Only a fool would have jumped to that conclusion.

Foo Fighters in V big surprise - 18th August

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2007380333,00.html

"THIS Is A Call for all FOO FIGHTERS fans – you can expect an extra-special surprise today at the V Festival. I can reveal the band are going to pack a punch with a top secret gig. I hear from impeccable sources that they are also planning a surprise for their fans. They will be playing an EXTRA set today, using another name. The band will be billed as 606 and are set to perform at 1pm on the smaller Channel 4 stage in Chelmsford. 'Somehow they have managed to keep it top secret so there wasn't a big circus around it.' Until now that is...oops!"

Ah here we are again in the Land of I Can Reveal. It doesn't seem to matter that Dave Grohl has made no secret of their potential smaller gigs, leading NME back in May to headline a piece "Foo Fighters to play secret festival slots" (click picture above). He said "I don’t want to give away any suprises and I know we’re playing the big stages, but you might want to keep an eye on the side stages too.”

No, this is Vicky revealing it to us, 3 months later. A cursory glance at Foo Fighters messageboards also shows that fans have been on the ball about this for several weeks now.

Scary Spice's second splice - 9th August

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2007360705,00.html

Another day, another fake WORLD EXCLUSIVE. Funny how this morning this was just a plain old EXCLUSIVE, but has now been upgraded for some unfathomable reason.

Once again the story was reported elsewhere before Vicky got hold of it. Even the TMZ website has the decency to credit Perez Hilton with breaking the news... Maybe Vicky is trying to work out who it's better to piss off - Perez or Rebekah...

Then of course there's turning a publicist's statement:

"The couple, who are both 32, had wanted to keep the ceremony out of the public eye as they planned a more formal wedding for friends and family later in the year. Melanie and Stephen felt that they were at a good point in their lives and wanted to make a private commitment to each other. They have been good friends for many years."

into quotes from Mel B herself.

"Last night Mel said: “Stephen and I have known each other for seven years. We wanted to make a commitment. We wanted it to be private and have a big wedding with our families later in the year.”

Shameless!

UPDATE - 10th August.

"I exclusively revealed in yesterday’s paper that Mel had tied the knot with old friend Stephen."

Can you smell burning? I think Vicky's pants are on fire!

Brit's crazy for it - 8th August

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2007360707,00.html

I reckon Vicky thinks this story about Britney Spears might be a WORLD EXCLUSIVE. I'm not sure whether it's the way WORLD EXCLUSIVE is printed in the newspaper, or the way WORLD EXCLUSIVE is on the front page of The Sun's website, as well as it saying WORLD EXCLUSIVE on the front page of Bizarre. Also, surprisingly, it says WORLD EXCLUSIVE on the actual page of the article too. What do you think she's trying to say with this?

Perhaps it's that no-one else has this story? I suspect that might be it. I'm going to have to assume that by WORLD, Vicky means WORLD (except America), as their equivalent of 'heat' magazine, Us Weekly, had this story and pictures on the front cover of their magazine yesterday (see mag cover above).

Rebekah has already chewed Vicky's ear for missing the Pete Doherty interview, might not be a good idea to be claiming a fake WORLD EXCLUSIVE at this point...

Blink and you'll miss it hypocrisy - 3rd August

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2007350825,00.html

Ah, those heady days of January 2007, when Celebrity Big Brother and Jade Goody prompted The Sun to run with the headline 'EVICT THE FACE OF HATE' alongside various pictures of Jade in mid blink, yawn, or whatever made her look like a Nazi. This down partly to the fact that Jade had called Shilpa Shetty "Shilpa Poppadom".

Yet, a little over 6 months later, Vicky seems to think it's okay to label a photograph of Hilary Duff dressed in vaguely ethnic clothing as "Hilary Poppaduff". By 11am the caption had been changed, but not before "PrtScn" had been hit on Darwin's keyboard... Click the picture above to see the before and after.

In a similar manner, going back once again to this article in which The Sun denounced the word 'chav' as being on a par with 'paki' and 'chinky', today Vicky gives us Kerry Katona wearing "chavvy" clothes. What is this? Stereotype Friday?